For 29 years, Penny and her husband Charlie have cared for their son Marcus, whose complex support needs mean caring is a round-the-clock responsibility. Caring for Marcus is a role that extends far beyond a typical workday; it shapes every aspect of family life, from daily routines, social outings, holidays, and even a good night's sleep.
While Penny says caring for Marcus has brought immense love and joy, it has also come with challenges that many people never see. Like many carers, she has experienced isolation, judgement and the feeling that others don't fully understand the realities of life behind closed doors.
"We don’t want people to feel sorry for us," Penny says. "All we really want is for people to listen to us.”
This National Carers Week (11-17 October), VMCH is recognising the invaluable contribution of carers across Victoria and encouraging the community to help make carers visible through understanding, acknowledgement and support.
The 2026 National Carers Week theme, Care for a Carer: Making Carers Visible, resonates strongly with Penny, who has spent decades balancing her caring role alongside family life.
"Sometimes people don't understand what life is really like for carers. We don't want pity. We just want people to understand that being a carer is challenging, and that being heard makes a difference."
Penny, Marcus and Charlie celebrating Marcus's birthday
It’s one of the reasons she values VMCH's carer events, which provide carers with an opportunity to step away from their caring responsibilities, connect with people who understand their experiences and take time to focus on themselves.
Through activities such as creative workshops, book clubs, theatre outings, overnight hotel stays and wellbeing experiences, carers are given space to recharge, reconnect and enjoy a break from the demands of their caring role.
Penny and Charlie have participated in several VMCH carer events, including a stay at Melbourne's iconic Langham Hotel.
"VMCH did that for me. I would never, ever get stay at the Langham Hotel," Penny says. "To be given that, we felt spoilt, cared for and appreciated for what we do! It reminded us of when we were young and fancy free."
She says the value of carer events extends far beyond the activity itself.
"People don't understand what these carer events mean to us. We need that balance. We need some normality in our life. We need that respite, and the breaks these carer groups give us are appreciated."
VMCH CEO Sonya Smart said carers play a vital role in communities across Victoria and deserve to be recognised and supported.
"At VMCH, we provide support to almost 2,300 unpaid carers, making us one of the largest state-funded carer support providers in Victoria," Sonya said.
"Our Carer Services team has grown to 20 members, helping carers navigate changing circumstances through tailored support, education and information, personal care, flexible respite and a range of special events throughout the year."
For Penny, that support has helped reinforce an important lesson she has learnt through nearly three decades of caring.
"Being a carer is hard, but it's also rewarding because you don't realise the strength you have within you until you're doing it," she says.
"I've become more resilient. I've got more empathy. I'm more patient. I've become more independent."
For information on VMCH's Carer Support services and upcoming events, visit VMCH Carer Events.